I loved him with all my heart's heart, but he promised only liking in return or, at the most, fondness.

I tried to turn off my love and divert its unused energy into exploring the city streets where nobody had ever been before. The prying terraced curtains tweaked of their own volition; loneliness gave me the courage to be myself. A comfort, too, were the shaggy shadows of distant high-rises where people had congregated for fear of these low-downs I roamed.

Indeed, I found myself seeking someone who was already with me, this causing my heart to play leap-frog: a found fondness deeper than love.


(published 'The Old Police Station' 1994)